I provided for myself conclusive evidence last night that I am a pessimist.
Was at a club in the city last night (said city being Adelaide, Australia for you imaginary new readers we like to think we get every now and then), and my mind wandered as it is wont to do. Being a stomping ground for young peacocks showing off their tailfeathers to the black widows, the surroundings prompted my thoughts to turn to old flames. My best friend being plastered to her new boyfriend on the couch next to me probably didn't help either.
At one point or another, we all do this. We take the likeliest unlikely place to meet an old flame and mentally create an encounter with them. Depending on how you and your ex parted ways, the likely outcomes of these imagined encounters are:
1) You hook up again
2) You shoot them in the face with arrows until it stops being funny (dying of old age about halfway through)
3) You have no old flames so stop daydreaming and start flirting. Have you even hit puberty yet?
My mind has a tendancy to run rampant, bouncing through tangents faster than a hadron collider invalidating a newfag's argument. You'll see evidence of this in my comics as soon as exams are over and I start clogging the tubes with them.
Closer to the point (HIGH SCORE!), in my mental encounter which was originally going to go down the road of #1 (sounds like my ex and I go to the toilet together, doesn't it? Bon apetit, mes amis.) however it didn't quite turn out that way - as unexpected to myself as anyone else.
What actually happened is that my big-mouthed best friend, whom I love dearly but sometimes wish I could garrotte with my mind, screwed it up for me. Yes, in an entirely imaginary encounter, someone actually screws it up and I don't live happily ever after. In my own mind. This struck me as immensely funny and I cracked up laughing which, after sitting pensively for a while, was apparently quite disconcerting. Two minutes later, my best friend's boyfriend (of about 3 days now) asks me a very specific question on a matter that I don't wish to talk about right now and asked my best friend not to air about to every person she meets.
Huzzah. I was terribly impressed. At least my mental impersonation of my best friend was accurate.
Ok, hassling the reader time. Yes, you, put your pants back on and pay attention. You have a task to perform.
ITT: Best friends you just wanna kill sometimes. kgo.
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2 comments:
hahaha there are always moments that i wish my best friend would shut the fuck up to be nice and blunt, example number one, I was chatting someone up all was going well (yay for alchol) followed by my friend saying "what areyou doing dean you are in a relationship" {btw i WASN'T and had been single for a while} so things went all wrong, followed by him telling me, "you could do better trust me"............
...Are you asking me to show you my hit list?
Yes, I finally read it. Leave me alone. :(
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